So. Not. In. The. Mood.

It’s the 10th of December.  i have some circular greenery stuck on my front door.  With a mangled, red ribbon – smooshed from overuse and bad storage habits.  Neighbors have tastefully decorated their lamp posts and entryways with wooden santas, pine shrapnel and understated light displays*.

i don’t shop.  i buy goofy shit for my kids, generally do something for my Mom**.  The random silly gift for friends, and perhaps a gift basket*** or two for the admin ladies at the office.  All of which can be taken care of via internet…which i did in about 20 minutes from work today on my lunch break.  it’s not hard.  Thoughtless impulse purchases take only minutes….

Tomorrow is the fucking office christmas party.  For the past few years, some of my geek-musician friends and i pull together some tunes, bring in a sound system and perform a few songs.  After the keg is half gone, we swap that out for karaoke to assure ample opportunity for public humiliation amongst our colleagues. 

Here i sit.  Just not feeling it.  Baked up some cinnamon-cranberry scones to bring to the office event.  Put up the christmas tree.  My house smells wonderful.  There’s a naked pine tree in my empty living room.  A content, but generally confused, dog at my feet.  My shopping – such as it is – is done.  No worries, no stress, no pressure…

Maybe i need to do something with the playlist i put on when i got home tonight?  Natalie Merchant and Rufus Wainwright do not make for cheeriness and holiday warmth.  And i should probably drop Joni Mitchell’s River from my setlist for tomorrow.  it’s the only christmas song i do… tends to make people wanna cut themselves, though… not good for a party.

So i’m switching over to some Bob Marley and UB40.  Then throwing a little Jon Stewart on the tv-tube and hitting the exercise equipment.  i think i’m just missing my kids… The Boy turns 20 in a few days, and is at school, taking his last final exam of the semester.  He’ll be around this weekend.  The Girl (aka “Danger Monkey”)?  Returns from her semester in Beirut on Monday…

it ain’t the stuff.  it’s the people.   it’s always about the people…

"And then the guy says, he says... 'MAAAAAAAARGRET! That wasn't a bratwurst!'"

* unlike my former neighbors, who were of the mind that unless your display pulled megawatts, and caused rolling blackouts, it wasn’t bright enough!

** Last years gift was such a big hit, i think i’m gonna give her a bathrobe this year….

*** Generally, gift cards, “smellies”, wine or booze and chocolates.  If the admin gal is suitably wired?  There have been potions, lotions and things that go “bzzzzz….”…  Ho, ho, ho!

23 thoughts on “So. Not. In. The. Mood.

  1. Hilarious Hitler poster (wow – never thought I’d say Hitler and hilarious in the same sentence). I feel the same way – we’ve got the tree up, no lights, no decorations outdoors – nuthin’. I am not motivated to buy anything, even on the internet. Blah humbug.
    Since you mentioned Rufus (who is not gay and totally into middle age housewives – ok that’s in my head) might I recommend Sufjan Stevens’ Songs for Christmas box set. Kind of low-key, melancholy but yet – still Christmas. Fa-la-la-la-fucking-la. Actually anything Sufjan Stevens says Christmas to me – the man knows his way around a glockenspiel.

  2. We get a 404 error on your link to your Mom’s gift. You need to take the duplicate out of the address.

    Archie McPhee, huh! I’m going shopping in Ballard tommorrow, I might have to stop by there. Sorry I can’t join you in the general doldrums this year, I just can’t get down with it. You’ve just had a lot of change this year, moving and all. The 22nd will be here soon.

  3. pickles – Sufjan Stevens? This is pretty brilliant stuff… as is this… Dark, brooding, but with a banjo? it’s just enough to get me to put the sharps away! Father “threw the gifts in the woodstove”? nice… i’m feeling better already!

    unbearable banishment – i’m not sure i need to find it… never been much for holidays (well, not since i turned 12 or so), birthdays and all that. i do love the lights and whatnot… may have to drag myself out to a local place that does it up with about 4 million lights… so long as it’s not muddy, i can catch a spark… UB40? Can’t stop boppin’ or smilin’ when they’re around!

    silverstar – thanks for catching the bum link! it’s fixed… Went to Ballard to McPhee Mecca the one time i was in Seattle! It’s truly the happiest place on earth for me! Megatons of silly, useless plastic crap that makes me smile! Bacon-flavored dental floss? Gotta have it!

  4. Hi Laura, It is hard enough when you kids are grown up to keep the Christmas stick up but this year the Grinch Economy litterally sucked the life right out of it.Oh well maybe next year.AJ

  5. i’m with you on this… part of it is ‘first holiday alone’, but a bigger part was being numbed by all the twits starting Christmas in early November, for gawds sake, with piped music, decorations, and sales ads. too damn soon and too damn much.

    So…. just be happy for happy’s sake and let the holiday roll around you.

  6. AJ – yep… i’m not much of a shopper for holidays and birthdays, i prefer to just do stuff when the time is right. not doing my part to un-grinch the economy i’m afraid. maybe next year will be better for folks…

    dolce – there’s not a particularly good time to be dealing with “end of life” issues for children, but suspect dropping all that smack-dab in the middle of christmas has to add some angst… feeling your howls from here…

    nm – AAAAARGH! i know. but he’s so pretty. so emo… maybe we could at least go hang out over coffee or something…

    gnu kid – doing about 4 hours ‘on stage’ today helped. didn’t do a single christmas tune, but jammin’ with “the band” makes me happy… getting paid for it? even better…

    annie – the recipe? use any recipe for cinnamon coffee cake, but you add 2 tsp of orange juice in place of water and orange-flavored dried cranberries. i can’t cook, so it had to be easy. circular pan, sliced into triangle thingies… i used a box mix. “modified off the shelf” is how i roll…

    uncle keith – Almost. But hitler was wearing a pine wreath and singing a Joni Mitchell song…

  7. We are SO on the same page right now. I’ve been meaning to post the inflatable fruitcake for a week. The same McPhee page you linked to also has squirrel underpants upon it.
    And, I posted Bob Marley for Feel Good Friday before I came over here.
    Weird vibes floating between your condo and my commune.

  8. squirrel queen – Definitely sharing the vibe! the Fruitcake is lovely, and suitable for mailing! About as tasty as the real thing, but unfortunately, can’t be used as a doorstop! Hope your ‘vibe’ is better. Bob Marley can cure just about anything that ails ya…

  9. A few people around my neighbourhood take it as a personal challenge to make the ‘Griswalds’ house seem like the darkside of the moon. Its just so heinous to see cut out wodden elfs and inflatable santas mixed in with 60 gajillion gigwatts of lightage.

  10. squirrel queen – i’m oscillating wildly between “ok” and “wanting to crawl under a rock until March”… more bob marley may be in order…

    alex – i just put up the tree. the wreath is on the door. as are some tiny ornaments hanging on dead chrysanthamums on my porch. i think they look festive…

  11. rob – right before his little brain melted down, anyway!

    paisley – those lotions and potions that smell like “Vanilla Ginger” or “Orange Melonblossom”… Bath and Body Works, and that sort of potion store…

  12. Great post. Christmas is sucking for me this year as well. But one of the bright spots in the season in Joni Mitchell’s “River” – one of my favorite Christmas songs ever. I can see why it may not be party music, though.

  13. A Free Man – welcome to the park! it’s a beautiful song… brings out every memory of every stupid thing i’ve ever done in any relationship… which takes awhile! but i have to put the sharps away when i perform this one…

  14. Pingback: Sort of getting there… « Trailer Park Refugee

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