Surf’s up

Funny thing about being stung by a jellyfish?  It doesn’t die after it stings you.

Unlike a bee sting, where you at least have some satisfaction in knowing that the little fucker has just flapped his little wings for the last time after he injects you with venom, the jellyfish just swims on.  Probably pretty oblivious that he has just fucked with your morning.

If a dog bites you?  You can smack it.  If you are attacked by a snake?  Crush it’s head with a shovel, and leave the body as a warning to the others.  But if you reach down to smack a jellyfish after it stings your legs?  It will happily sting your arm, and then swim off without a care.

On the bright side?  It’s not going to ruin the weekend…

Not too long ago, i realized that it had been about 6 years since my kids and i have had a vacation together.  Starting in about 1998, we’d take off somewhere for Spring Break*, and it seemed a good time for us to do it again.  They’ve both been working overtime, and a long weekend seemed like the thing to do.

So here we are.  i let them choose from a short list of east coast locations.  The winner?  Tybee Island, Georgia.  No major plans, other than a couple of beach days, then a couple days farting around in Savannah.  While they were snoozing the morning away, i hit the beach.

And that was when the beach decided to hit me back.  All in all, there are worse things than being stung by a jellyfish.  Like returning to your hotel room, informing your children that you’ve had a minor scrape with the local wildlife, and getting the sympathetic response of “Hey, want me to pee on it?” from your son…


* My approach to avoiding the dreaded “Mom, can I go to Daytona Beach with a car full of stupid teenaged boneheads for spring break?” question?  Take them somewhere better from the time they were in junior high school.  Germany,  England, San Francisco, the desert southwest…  We had some adventures. 

22 thoughts on “Surf’s up

  1. Psychopath? Naw. I believe it was meant as a sick, twisted and loving joke – the kind that Daisyfae and her demon seeds do best – why, I hope that one day my own son…ok well, no I don’t.

  2. Smithsonian magazine just did a big spread on jellyfish. A. There are lots and lots of varieties…and their territories are expanding because of global warming. B. Some are seriously poisonous and can kill you DAID.

    Happy summer.

  3. *ack* i meant to email y’all about that! vinegar or rubbing alcohol will kill the stingers. i’m so sorry i missed all y’all at the airport! my flight was delayed, too! 😦

  4. I hear that peeing thing is a myth, though I will continue to make the offer to anyone I know who gets stung. At least it wasn’t one of those tiny, fatal kind they have in Australia.

  5. Any crude make it around the horn of FL yet?

    Have had narrow encounters with jellyfish; not been stung. So far.

    I would have offered the pee solution as well.

    Have fun, y’all!

  6. Savannah is a great little place, top notch food and gorgeous architecture… didn’t know i was so cultured did ya? and you can spray windex on jellyfish stings to make them stop itching and stinging as well.

  7. I just read a story in the paper not long ago about a bunch of swimmers (mainly kids) who were stung by a huge, dead jellyfish that had broken up in the water. Apparently, you can still be stung by a dead jellyfish. What a rotten trick to play!

  8. renalfailure – it’s an ‘urban legend’ cure for a jellyfish sting. but it is also an indicator of mental state. most frighteningly? he said “It wouldn’t be the first time i”ve peed on someone. or the second.”

    mstngsal – the cure. it was a sick, and creepy, joke. and i’m sure your spawn will enliven your future. it’s inevitable.

    kyknoord – tomorrows forecast for the beach is far less interesting…

    nana – i learned tonight from one of the locals that its because the water is so warm right now. he invited us back in october. said the critters are less annoying then… less jellyfish, too!

    savannah – no problem! stung for a bit, but the lifeguard fixed me up. i rubbed wet sand on it, then he hit it with the lidocaine spray, and it only stung for about an hour. the swelling was gone by dinnertime. we are having a blast, and i suspect we’ll have to come back! will catch up with you then… love it here!

    chris – you are quite the gentleman! my first sting. was always afraid of jellies, and after this? no worse than a bee sting. figure that the odd of running into one of the killer jellies are pretty slim. this won’t keep me out of the sea…

    girly – Hmmm…. i am rather gelatinous around the middle! maybe i’ve become SUPER JELLY WOMAN!

    rob – no tar balls in these parts. the water is gorgeous, and as warm as bathwater! we’re having a blast…

    kono – you are one of the smartest, most cultured dudes i’ve tripped upon out here. not surprised at all. given the choice of being sprayed with windex, or peed on? i’d have to think about it…

    unbearable banishment – i’ve been warned that you never walk near a dead jellyfish on the beach, because the stingers are ‘live’, and can extend quite a ways around the body… it does seem pretty rotten that they can fuck with you post-mortem…

  9. will I be seeing you on “Shark Week” also..This is why I don’t go in the water.
    besides..I guess it depends on who’s doing the peeing in the first place.

  10. DP – trying to be a knight in golden armour, were you?

    nursemyra – hey, HEY! that damn thing was the size of a freighter! and it was coming right for me…

    gnukid – we uploaded a bunch of bread and peanut butter from the breakfast buffet for a cheap lunch. that might have worked…

    stephanie – we’re in savannah now, and it’s wicked cool. it’s also wicked hot. if you’re going to visit? don’t do it in august…

    hisqueen – in the end, it was no worse than a bee sting. for me, i’m less freaked out about them since i know it really wasn’t as bad as i’d imagined. and we’ve been watching A LOT of shark week…

    cew – one of the gals in the grocery store suggested that when i was buying the lanacane. and she said she’d been selling a BUNCH of it this week. but the water was as warm as i’ve ever felt an ocean. it was gorgeous!

  11. silverstar – yeah, i had to do a bit of reading after the fact, as i wasn’t sure why it started to welt up again… but it’s fine. itchy. the lifeguard didn’t hit it with vinegar, but benzocaine. i think vinegar would have been better… live and learn!

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