i have achieved…

“Slumlord” status…

My house shall have tenants, effective 1 October.  Not bad, since it only went on the market a month earlier.  i have to hand it to my hired gun property manager – he as much promised me he’d have it occupied within a month or two.  My month of scrambling to get it repaired, painted, de-dog-ified and shiny-spanking clean paid off.

Relief.

i’m a little surprised that there are no sappy, sentimental feelings about it.  Despite the fact that it was my home for twenty years.  The place i raised (and in the case of The Boy, conceived) my children.  The home where i shared uncounted laughs, shed a few tears, and scratched my bits while looking out the front window in the morning.  Threw a few parties.  Cleaned up a lotta party shrapnel. 

Bottom line:  i’m not raking up over 40 bags of leaves this fall.  YEE-FUCKING-HAW!

The new tenants – mercifully signing a 20 month lease – are moving to the area due to a job transfer.  And have a dog – which was one of the things i wanted for the house.  There have been smelly hound dogs in that place for a long time.  Seems to give it good karma, feng shui, or whatever…

Perhaps making this transition less challenging is the fact that i’m paying a professional to “manage” the property.  For a mere 10% of the rent each month, he will manage the paperwork, do background/credit checks on tenants, handle all midnight emergency calls, arrange repairs, collect rent, initiate eviction if necessary and in general – do all of the shit work i do not wish to perform.  A good deal any way you slice it. 

Since i’ve got a henchman, i’m an evil slumlord in name only…