“Because I have a penis…”

Bike ride tonight after work – part of my attempt to drop the extra pounds, and taking advantage of snippets of spring weather as they appear.  i went riding with my work out buddy – also sharing the weight loss quest.

We are marginally obsessive in our approach to fitness.  We use an online tool for tracking our daily caloric intake, as well as our daily caloric “burn”.  To lose 2 lbs per week, on average, we try to burn 1000 cal/day more than we consume.

After the bike ride tonight – an easy 14 miles, average speed around 12 mph – we stopped at my house to calculate our numbers and compare notes.  In a head to head comparison of our biking expenditures, i became agitated.

You see, for the exact same time/distance, he burned 662 cal (9 cal/minute) vs my 515 cal (7 cal/min).   Yes, i understand that men typically have slightly higher metabolic rates, as they tend to have less body fat.  But when i continued to stew about this, he sighed and said:  “But daisyfae – i have a penis…”*, shrugging and gesturing politely toward his unit.

He didn’t see my shoe flying toward his head…**


* in a prior conversation, i made the unfortunate mistake of telling my late friend of a conversation with The Boy, where he finally ended our disagreement with the statement “oh, that’s right.  You don’t have a penis…” when implying that i wasn’t maintaining logic.

** calories burned throwing shoe? who gives a shit…