Watch out for the salt….

Four weeks ago, my immediate management chain started preparing for the annual goat rope known as “Spring Review”.  Panties were bunched, upper lips steeled, and strategy sessions were held…

i attended.

Initial planning had me preparing, and delivering, a one hour presentation to our Chief Executive Officer (CEO), Chief Technical Officer (CTO) and the entire senior leadership group.

“This is our chance to shine!  To show them how good we are!”

Awww… Isn’t my new division boss cute?  She genuinely believed this…

Three weeks ago, things got more intense.  More strategic planning sessions were held.  Budgets were analyzed.  Programs were chopped or reorganized.  Facilities were documented.

i put together a few responses to targeted taskings.  Then went to the gym.

But wait!  Stop the presses!  We’re getting feedback from the front office — they don’t want technical stuff, they want management stuff!  We need to kick this up to a higher level review.

Cool!  The “Horsie/Duckie” stuff is in my wheel house!  Even better…And my one hour presentation is now only going to be 30 minutes….  Well.  Look at the time?  That’s lunch!

So by last week – in the home stretch – we did a complete 180 degree turn.  New strategy.  New “required” presentation charts.  Those other charts they asked for three weeks ago?  Put ’em in back up… Just in case anyone asks…

Time for my horseback riding lesson.  i’ll get right on that tomorrow.

By the time we got to the “Final Friday Strategy Session” before our big “Monday Review” today?  i was only on the hook for a 20 minute pop.

Damn good thing i hadn’t wasted a single minute of the past few weeks working on my one hour presentation.

i worked an 8 hour charity event on Saturday.  Sunday?  Took four hours out to ride my bike to a minor league baseball game and enjoy some time in the sun.  Poked at the presentation over the weekend.  Submitted it to management at 7pm last night.

And delivered it this morning.  To rave reviews.

So the lesson for all of you parents fretting that your little hippie kids are farting around with those theater classes when you think they should be studying hard sciences, or getting trained in something that can provide a living wage?

Let ’em take that improv class.  It’ll pay off when they’re older.

Oh, and it also genuinely helps to not give a shit about your own career advancement….

Achievement

Poof.  My Outlook Inbox was empty.  So was the “Sent” folder.
 
Just. Like. That.
 
Given that i’d changed jobs over a year ago, it was time to turn in my old laptop back at the prior shop.  Well, that laptop and the two ancient, fossilized laptops that i’d checked out over the previous decade.
 
On the bright side?  i had kept close track of the business equipment that had been loaned to me – and had no trouble locating all three bricks.  The downside?  Needed to crank them up and clear off my “Stuff”.  From photos to documents to all the e-mail that had been downloaded onto the desktops. 
 
Always a good plan to purge* prior to returning your equipment.
 
The first mistake i made on Thursday night was letting the laptop connect to my home wireless network.  That assured that my current outlook inbox was happily downloaded to the laptop.  The other fatal mistake?  Forgetting to re-set the ‘over-rides’.  This assured that any changes i made on the laptop would trump whatever was on the desktop system back at the office.
 
Oops.
 
When i arrived at work Friday morning, and realized my boo-boo, it was a blip.  Nothing.  Instead of rage and frustration at my own stupidity, it was “Well, huh.  How about that?” 
 
Granted, anything of size or substance had been downloaded to my desktop.  i can find it if i have to.  There are archives, too.  But the last time I’d archived was around April, i think.  So the ‘current events’ message traffic was all vaporized.
 
Now, here’s the funny thing.  Ten years ago?  i’d have been a salivating, ranting, hot, screaming mess.  It would have been debilitating, and i’d have been down at the IT help desk, asking them to pull the most recent weekly ‘back up’ files to restore what i’d dumped.  “Veins popping on my forehead” rage. 
 
Now?  i can hardly muster the energy to give a shit.  It’s sheer magic, i tell you…  
 
This is a milestone of note.  i have achieved irrelevance! 


* i’ve been a supervisor.  i know first-hand that the IT folks LOVE to root around on the returned equipment and see what folks have been up to.  i didn’t have anything on my equipment that would get me fired.  Not by a long shot.  But there were some personal e-mails buried in the mix – scheduling a booty call,  post-game analysis of a booty call, making fun of other people i work with, horrific foul language – that had to go.