“You had a choice”

As is tradition, i got quite a Mother’s Day card this year.  They always come up with something a bit off beat.  Since The Girl is still in London, it was all on The Boy to create one this year.  As he presented it to me, with a lovely bottle of 12-year old single malt scotch, he expressed some concern.

The Boy:  Usually The Girl is my ‘checks and balances’, making sure it’s not too far over the top.  I really wasn’t sure if this one was.  I was a little toasty when I did it.  Hope you’re not mad…

On the inside:

Here’s the text, in  case you can’t read this:

Dear Mom,

I feel like now is an appropriate time to thank you for a number of things that have previously been left unsaid.  One: Thank you for giving the UPS driver a second chance.*  Two: thanks for not taking the easy way out (i.e. back alley abortion, leaving me in a hot car with the windows rolled up, or the more obvious throwing me in a dumpster.  Tres:  That’s three in Spanish!  Four: Thanks for tricking “Dad” into raising two illegitimate “kids”.  You both have been great “parents”.


The Boy

Nope.  Just the right amount of “over-the-top”.  As in “WAAAAAAY!”  But that’s how us three crazy bastards roll.

We had a grand day out.  He fixed me an omelette for breakfast, scavenged from the few remaining items in the fridge and pantry.  Then it was off to a parking lot carnival – which happens every year.  Seemed a lot smaller this year, so i beat him at a quasi-skilled game, and we headed out for Bad Juan margaritas.  Stopped at the driving range first, and bashed a bucket of balls on the way there.

A very good day.  He’s doing great.  i’m one happy mother.  i had a choice.  Indeed.


* Long running family joke, started by his Dad, is that The Boy was the product of frequent visits from the UPS driver.  You see, after The Girl was born, i grew to absolutely detest going shopping, and discovered internet shopping, free shipping, and spending the day in my underwear.  There were always packages arriving, if you know what i mean…