With my son sharing tales of his Drill Sergeant’s philosophy during basic training in 2013, I got started with my annual list of priorities. A means to keep the important self-improvement issues on the front burner. Resolutions? In a way. But that has such negative connotations – who actually keeps resolutions?
These are goals – which require some degree of metrics, and accountability. By posting my annual goals, and then holding myself accountable to report out how I’m doing every quarter, it’s been helpful to keep me on track, working on the things I most need to work on.
For 2014, i focused on unfucking myself a bit. My possibly broken finger (and easy one to start with), my space (cluttered, heavy with stuff), and my body (fat, weak). Some progress in all three areas, but I wasn’t done at the end of the year with two of those…
For 2015, i focused on repairing important relationships that i’d blown up, continuing to get rid of the stuff that weighs me down, and keep working on being healthier and less fat. Some progress in all, but clearly not done with all of that.
What is common for the past two years? My health and fitness – this will likely be a lifetime pursuit. Well, it’s not exactly something i’ll need to worry about after i’m dead. i also need to get rid of ‘things’, organize what remains, and be ready to die.
What does this mean? i must optimize for life AND death.
The fitness habits forged over the past two years is entrenched. Three days a week, Studley and i do cardio on our lunch hours at a nearby fitness center. i am still riding a horse every week – and my instructor is fond of ‘calorie burner’ lessons. Balancing in the stirrups at a solid trot is a bit of work… Weather permitting, i’m on a bicycle at least 2-3 times a week.
Adding two high intensity interval training classes to my week this year, i’ve started lifting weights – and i love it! Muscles? Hello there! It’s been awhile! And my ass no longer brushes the back of my thigh in the shower! i look forward to these classes! One of my gym buddies uses the phrase “Harder to Kill”, and that really captures what i want – stronger, faster, more resilient…
Preparing to die is a bit harder. What are my goals for being dead? Not being a pain in the ass to my children. This has a few elements involved – minimizing my physical footprint (ie: purging stuff), financial planning and organization, taking care of unfinished personal business… i’ve been working on this, but it remains seriously undone.
This year i’m going with two goals – things that have really been at the core of what i’ve done for the past two years. i shall Prepare to Die while simultaneously making myself Harder to Kill.
Trailer Park Refugee 
I suppose I’m doing pretty much the same, except that I’m not doing gym work.I try to keep up with moderate exercise;in other words, not pushing my old joints too hard.Elbows are getting a good work-out!:-) And The Man and I have an appointment set with a professional number-cruncher. The de-cluttering continues…
What’s our favourite word? Onward!
The gym work has become unexpected fun! I look forward to seeing my work out mates, it’s very supportive and friendly, and when someone nails a tough move, we all cheer! I need to stop showing people my little bicep, though. Suspect that is getting old. And asking people I know pretty well to feel my ass and thigh – they are firm and feel really good, but people probably are just indulging me to be polite! Onward, indeed sister!
I need to start on the de-cluttering – my daughter still living at home doesn’t help it seems there is no urgency but I worry when I need to I’ll not do it and I’m more adding to the clutter with more CDs, DVDs, books than I’m removing from it. There is a chest of drawers in the garage that we don’t need but is in my opinion “Too good to waste” so it sits there with a tartan rug over it saying to me everytime I struggle past it with the bins etc. “Just put me out of my misery you silly sod”…
It’s overwhelming, for sure. My daughter moved out of the country over 4 years ago, and I am still housing a lot of her stuff – now mostly books that she can’t bear to part with! But at least I organized them, labeled them, and have them stored out of the way. I tried (for a short while) to have a rule where I take out 2x (volume) of what I bring in – if I buy 1 CD, I get rid of 2 CDs (etc.). Didn’t stick with it…
The ‘too good to waste’ is also a huge challenge – but I’ve been giving it to charity, thinking that someone else out there can use it. For this year, I’ve found the local organization that does refugee resettlement – and they will be getting furniture and housewares from me. Something I believe matters, knowing there are people who can USE what I have STORED. It helps!
Good luck!
I don’t understand your Prepare to Die movement. You do know that you could easily have another 25-30 years in your tank, don’t you? Death isn’t going to come knocking on your door for quite some time. Glad you’ll be Harder to Kill, though. That’s the spirit.
Have you been paying attention, dear? Bowie – a man with unlimited resources, dead as a stump at 69 years old. Steve Jobs? Multi-mega-uber-billionaire died at 56. I am not confused about this one. Preparing to die IS useful for preparing to LIVE, too. Reminding myself that the clock is ticking, knowing I’m circling that drain? Helps me frame my day-to-day activities. I don’t get as annoyed by the little things… although cut me off in traffic and risk the Finger of Vengeance!
Don’t forget Lemmy, Glenn Fry and Mott the Hoople drummer Dale Griffin. All cut down in the past few weeks and not very old. You’ve made your point.
Jobs was an idiot. Instead of chemo he relied on new-agey, California hippie remedies. He should still be with us.
Kick his ass Daisy!!! We all need to be prepared to die, it’s part of life, or as Alan Watts said, how can you know life if you don’t know death? once you weren’t here, now you are, and someday you won’t be again… or as John Updike commented, we die every day only to be reborn in the morning, we are never the same person day to day no matter what we may think and the person we were yesterday is gone and the only one we have is here now… yes i’ve been smoking copious amounts of ganja, can you tell?
Yeah. It’s been a bad month to be a rock star from the 70’s… But you know what? They’re going to keep dropping… as are we… Jobs? He was going to die anyway… (are you picking up the theme?)
kono – you keep smokin’ the ganja! it’s good for you! better than tap water, that’s for sure!
I need that printed on a work out shirt, “Harder To Kill” loves it! Just keep down the extreme sports and you won’t need the prepare to die stuff that soon.. You rock, btw, how is Studley’s knees? recovered? We need to know this stuff, you’re family!
It’s motivational as hell, isn’t it? The small gym where I go is just starting to have t-shirts and whatnot. We may have to have this made into a shirt… My extreme sports adventures are pretty aggressively “risk managed”. I have a helmet shelf in my garage, wear Kevlar while on the motorcycle (all the gear, all the time), and have continued to train for SCUBA, NEVER taking unnecessary risk.
Studley is a rock star! Doing great, 4 months post surgery! He was driving and back at work after 4 weeks, started back full time in January, and is about to ‘graduate’ from physical therapy. He won’t be 100% for many months, but he’s back at the gym (modified workouts), and we’re going on a SCUBA trip soon!
EDIT: he just corrected me! Only 3 months post surgery! Oh, and ‘thanks for asking!’
Can I use those same two goals? They sound good to me and, as a bonus, it would be a lot easier to use yours than create my own.
Maybe I’ll even use your progress as my own, too.
I don’t know why it took me so long to see the simplicity of what I’m REALLY trying to do…Unless something specific appears, I’m pretty sure these will sustain me through the next few years, too…
Please join me! Better yet, let’s plan to go out on the motorbikes sometime when the weather is better. Certainly needs to be better than today!
I too am in love with “Harder to Kill” phrase! ❤
I've dropped the weight, now i'm in the process of building the muscle and toning the loose flesh (not as easy to do at 47! lol)
Plan for the worst and hope for the best …. plan to die and become harder to kill ….. LOVE IT!
Ms. Fyre, you epitomize “harder to kill”! It’s been so much fun watching you transform! You inspire me, my dear! Sharing that struggle with the loose flesh – holy crap, am I EVER going to be able to get rid of these ‘bingo wings’? Biceps are easy, toning the triceps is damn near impossible! But let’s keep at it, shall we?
I am in awe of you. Really. I admire your ability to focus, and know what you what want and how to get there. Plan to die and become harder to kill, is a great philosophy. I hope that 2016 brings you all the muscles, and purging you require to do both those things.
Thank you! I’m so surprised, and happy, that you are still reading! Figured you’d wandered off… The ability to focus on myself has become easier as i am no longer ‘life support’ for others. You are always working on the care and feeding of others – figuratively and literally – and it makes it so much harder to care for yourself.
i hope that for 2016 you can carve out some time for owlhawk… she is awesome, and worthy of some care and feeding, too! ❤
Yes, I spend a lot of time thinking about the arrangements after I die. I haven’t got your motivation to health and fitness and I’ve got a couple of habits that probably aren’t going to prolong my life, but as you say, preparing to die is important at any time.
There won’t be anything financial to sort out (apart from my debts I suppose), but If I can afford it, I’m ending up in a woodland burial place about 12 miles north of here. You don’t have any kind of stone or memorial — you just literally, go back to earth. I love the idea.
life lived in fear isn’t living – and you are pursuing what brings you joy, even if it knocks a few of the ‘diapered’ years off the end of your life. i am doing the same thing – probably in different ways!
I’ve heard of the woodland, ‘natural’ burial, and agree that just going back to the dirt is a pretty good plan… would hope that they dig down deeply enough that the local pack of feral mutts can’t easily excavate what’s left and drag it through the neighborhood!
Although i’ve not made formal plans, i’d prefer cremation. Ultimately, i’m leaving it up to my children what to do with them. Scattered in the ocean, or by the roadside, will make no difference to me, since i’ll be long gone by then!
Unfucking relationships can be a full time occupation. My human is in that process now – with some of his best friends family members and his own “chillin.” Strangely enough it was things he was trying to do to help. The old saying “No good deed goes unpunished” can be very true. In one case he was going to drive his friend from his summer home in the north back to Florida and in the other case it was over his choice in Christmas presents (cash). Go figure-