While Mom was in ICU, and on a ventilator, she was still communicating with us. She could nod her head, and even tried writing letters in the air. i made a makeshift white board using a notebook and some dry erase markers, but her hand wasn’t steady enough to write.
We improvised – we played it as a cross between “Hangman” and “Wheel of Fortune”, with a little bit of “20 Questions” thrown in to narrow the topic. One of us would slowly say the alphabet and she’d squeeze our hand when we got to the right letter. “A… B… C… [squeeze]. C? The first letter is ‘C’?” and she’d nod her head.
We’d move to the second letter… took some time, but she was able to tell us a few things.
First thing she wanted to say? “I love you…”
Later that afternoon, she started writing in the air with her finger. We played the game again and she spelled “C. O. L. D.” – she needed a blanket…
The next morning, she indicated she wanted to tell us something – she spelled “B. A. B….”
daisyfae: “Baby? You’re having a baby?”
Mom: [glares at daisyfae and shakes her head]
She had been trying to spell out “Barb”, her best friend from church…. so we got Barb from the waiting room to come back and visit…
The last one was tough… My sister, T, her partner, DQ and i were with her as she started to spell something new…. i used the white board to keep track of the letters, and help us guess what she was trying to say.
We went slowly through the alphabet, and came up with “N… E…. E…. D…” First word is “Need”….
Second word… “T”… “O”… “Need to….”
Very much like Ralphie from “A Christmas Story” as he used his Little Orphan Annie decoder ring to decipher the secret message…
Third word, first letter…. “P”
DQ: You need to P? But Granny, you’ve got a catheter…
daisyfae: Do you need to poop?
Mom: [vigorous nodding]