Doing a heading check with Taylor, one of my young scientists at the office.  Going over various and sundry things as we go into yet another round of “reorganization”, assuring him that his work is valued and that i will continue to captain him through the apparent bureaucratic storm.

We then wandered off into “whazzup”… and i mentioned that i’m off for a long weekend to orchestrate another extended family ‘cousins’ reunion in Tennessee.  He’s aware of some of my trailer park issues, and as a kid coming up from a rough launch in one of the poorest parts of South Carolina, he just gets it…

He asked after the warring factions at the homestead.  i’d clued him in to the living arrangements for my Mom, and the ongoing feud with my sister in Florida, Hurricane T as she railed against the exploitation of Mom’s finances by my niece DQ.  He asked if they would all be in the same place…

My sister hasn’t visited Mom for two years – the last time she came back to The Park she could not contain her rage at the living arrangements.  At that time, Mom was living in a bed in DQ’s living room, displayed like a zoo animal.  Sister T was beyond livid.  And we all agreed that future visits would need to be on neutral turf until the renovations on the old homestead are competed.

The reunion offered a very convenient chance to organize a visit with Mom and daughter, T.  As the event organizer, i watched another Trailer Park Mexican Standoff as both T and DQ didn’t confirm attendance until the last-minute.  Almost simultaneously, in fact.

daisyfae:  Yes.  And my role?  i’ve rented a third cabin to house Mom, my sister, her partner and myself, to assure some degree of neutral territory with my niece and her clan…

Taylor:  Seems like a good strategy!

daisyfae: i’m functioning as NATO Peace-keeper, while trying to assure that my Mom and my cousins have a good chance to visit and re-connect.

Taylor:  Yeah.  I know how that works.  The last time my family attempted a reunion?  The cops were called about three times.  A few arrests and everything.  We decided to quit doing reunions…


image found here

So i’m off to a glorious hollow in northern Tennessee.  Long weekend.  Doing a reprise of our long weekend in 2008 on a gorgeous Kentucky lakefront.  Still trying to untangle an intricate mix of “Tennessee Liquor Laws” to assure that Hurricane T and i are not going to run out of essentials.

A few of my cousins are fully aware of the family dynamics, and are only concerned with spending time with Mom – as she is the last of the three sisters of the clan.  i love these people.  Should be entertaining.  A metric fuck-ton* of blog-fodder if nothing else…


* Metric Fuck-ton = 10 Metric Shit-tons.  Also, a Shit-ton = 1.6 Metric Shit-tons.  Know your units of measure, folks…

28 thoughts on “Relativity

  1. Your Mum’s accomodation problems with the never-finished renovations do seem to just go on and on. So all the more to hope she (and you, and everyone) have a great time.

      • God, I sincerely hopes she lives long enough to enjoy it. you poor mother has had to put up with so much. May the only rain you experience this weekend be alcoholic 😉

        • although i provisioned for alcoholic adventures, it seemed prudent to stay sober. and i did. it worked out ok…. i have to start to compartmentalize, sort and organize everything that happened. gonna take awhile. maybe wrap up the blog by the time i’m done….

    • that’s the GOOD kind of relativity! and bug spray? i got out of the car this afternoon and was immediately assaulted by a fly the size of a small commuter jet. Hurricane T was called and i asked her to buy bug spray, after they left the liquor store near the Knoxville airport….

  2. Nice to see Americans employing a little bit of my beloved Metric system. Measuring shit-tons and fuck-tons the old way is just so damned tedious.

    • we’ve never quite gotten the hang of it, have we? it makes so much more sense to me… i think i’m going to need more of a Giga, or something, though, as the fodder continues to build…

  3. sugar, these are the stories that make me glad i’m an only and that the MITM’s harpy of a sister no longer feels the need to try and pretend we like each other! enjoy your weekend and there can never be too much booze! xoxoxoxo

    • i will stick this out as long as mom’s around… after that? i’m likely to drop off the face of the earth as far as the rest of them know. may have to create a story about joining the Peace Corps or something…

  4. Ooooo … I can hardly wait!
    A metric fuck-ton of fodder!
    I think I need to stock up on a few essentials … wouldn’t want to run out!

    Have fun, be safe and hopefully you won’t have to get all NATO Peace-keeper on their asses!

  5. The only reorganizations that happen in my company are when I move the furniture in the living room.

    We gave up on family reunions long ago, not because of the cops being called but because of deep apathy on all quarters. Nothing like a family “reunion” where no one can be bothered to attend.

    • as adults, we arranged a couple of “afternoon picnic”-style reunions. found we liked each other, and sort of wanted to hang out more. so eldest cousin, S, wanted to try for a weekend thing – and arranged the first one 3 years ago. this one? different circumstances, changes in attendees, two deaths in the first/second generation…. but we did it… and are planning the next…

  6. Is it Tenn where you can’t purchase beer and liquor in the same store? I live outside TN in MS and can’t remember which set of laws govern. I like Indiana’s laws because you can buy bottle liquor in Krogers! yay! But the beer is hot. boo. In Tenn and MS only cold beer in grocery stores, no wine etc. I was at Lake Norris this past week-end. Beautiful area.

    • Hi Mary – Welcome to the Trailer Park! In TN, 90% of the counties are ‘limited’ alcohol. NO alcohol (including beer) in many others — COMPLETELY DRY! i packed in provisions, as i was driving. Hurricane T and her partner did homework, and found a liquor store near the Knoxville airport (Knox county is one of about 3 that have open liquor laws), and we were sufficiently provisioned… but it’s confusing as hell…

      We were in the Lake Cumberland region, and it is absolutely stunning! i expected ‘remote’, but i didn’t expect wildnersess – which is what we had… 20 minutes of nearly off-roading to get from the nearest town to our cabins. my poor car…

  7. I hope you had fun with Hurricane T! I want a sister to drink with!
    We went to Boston last weekend for my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary. It was really fun, but also somewhat depressing. I realized my dad was truly getting demented when he couldn’t recall the original Avengers. He even thought that “woman in red white and blue” might have been on of them. He didn’t mean Ms. Marvel – he meant Wonder Woman. She’s a DC character. The old dad would have scoffed at someone making such a stupid mistake.

    • it was a helluva weekend – lots to write. need to collect my thoughts. but Hurricane T and i inflicted a little damage to the livers…. Very cool that your folks celebrated 50 years! how cool is that? Maybe you should make him an Avengers Eye Chart or some flash cards?

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