Not quitting my day job

Over the weekend, i attended a friend’s 50th birthday party.  It was an outdoor picnic, complete with roast pork products, many dozen friends and relatives, and perhaps a few coolers full of beer.  She’d asked me to bring my guitar, and be prepared to drop in with one of her other friends to provide some entertainment.

With my arm twisted so tightly behind my back, it took a full nanosecond for me to say “Sure!”, while simultaneously blowing the dust off my set books and digging my guitar case out from under the spare bed.

Dragging my friend Studley McRocklegs along as roadie for the day, we spent a pleasant afternoon celebrating.  When it was time to set up the amps/microphones, we ran the extension cords, and grabbed a few more beers.  i had a wonderful time jamming with her friends, encouraging crowd participation*, and throwin’ down like a wannabe rock star!

On the drive back, Studley couldn’t wait to tell me about a conversation that occurred while i was performing.

Charlie [grillmaster, full of Bud Light]:  Hey, you’re wife’s really good!  Do you think she could play at our pig roast in September?

Abby [Charlie’s patient wife]:  She’s not his wife! 

Studley:  She loves doing it!  I’m sure she’d be willing to play…

Charlie:  How much does she charge?

Studley:  Nothing, she just does it for fun!  If there’s a roasting pig, you probably can’t keep her away.

Charlie:  She’s good!  Seriously, how much does she charge?

Studley:  Seriously, she’ll do it for free! [grinning] And careful how you ask that, Charlie!

Charlie:  Oh, I ain’t sayin’ she’s a whore or anything…

*Always bring a cowbell.  i never leave home without it…

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33 thoughts on “Not quitting my day job

    • nope. went to high school with him. despite the cowboy boots and hat, he’s a local boy… and a good fella, too. methinks the drink had him a little crosswise…

  1. How lovely, that the joy you had with the music and the day showed. And was shared by others. And how nice to be wanted. How much do you think you could charge? Perhaps Studley (who is a keeper) could become your agent.

    • it was a little like “live band karaoke”, once we got started! very cool when folks got up and wanted to sing! except for the 12 year old, who wanted to know if i could play anything by Justin Bieber, it was a grand success…

      Although Studley is a hot property – being stalked by crazy admirers as i type – we’re companions for good reason… partly because if i ever needed a pimp? he’s aces!

      • Shoot! Even I could manage a Justin Bieber set…oh-oooh! baby, baby, baby.
        A three chord rocker with a lot of vocal drown-out and you’re there. Repeat, ad nauseum.

        Looks like a fun party. I need to have another one!

      • it was a blast! a friend from high school – a ‘re-connect’ rather than old friend – hosted a party for about 75 folks. ages ranged from newborn to 90! i met some delicious and wonderful new folks, and had a ball! life is good!

    • in fact, i can play all of these! but my guess is that when the picture was taken, i was singing “but i cry sometimes when i’m lying in bed, just to get it all out from in my head, and i, i am feeling… a little peculiar”…

      a therapeutic sing-along if there ever was one!

  2. He didn’t say you weren’t, either. One of my friends down here got well into his cups one night and went with, “I’m not threatening. I’m just saying.” We were never sure what he was supposed to be threatening us with.

    • “well into his cups”… i love that phrase. my son has referred to it as “showing your cups”… suspect your friend wasn’t sure what he was threatening either…

  3. I’m having a wee shindig over at mine this weekend, are yis up for a strum on the oul strings and more than a few cold ones doll? There’ll be a pig roast, one or two chickens plus the usual stack of ribs, followed by dancing and singing. Bring your pal nursie along, it’ll be fun.

    • Fantastic plan! And since your place is a former house of worship, i’d be delighted to sing “Laid”, which is my favorite love song. Perhaps “Blister in the Sun” – which is an ode to masturbation, too?

  4. Jimmy Buffett actually wrote a song: I Will Play for Gumbo I suppose you could adapt it for pig roast…. Sounds like you were having a wonderful time.

    Seriously, how much do you charge???? I love it when people ask me that.

    • i’ve managed to avoid any paying gigs so far – once, by turning over my share of the profits to the other performers. i feel far more comfortable keeping my ‘amateur’ status. if i keep a dime, i’m ‘pro’, and the expectations go way up. mine do, anyway. i don’t need the pressure. i’m not THAT good!

      • Ahh, I understand completely. Especially in the “arts”, once you accept paying gigs you are right, expectations go way up. And also, the critics feel more free to exercise their mouths.

        Amateur status is a good one. I always like to remember the root of that word is “love” — doing something you love for only that recompense.

  5. In the picture – why are the people so far away? And why is the trash can so close? I keep thinking there’s a person in the trash can and expect to see little feet under the trash can bringing it closer and closer… or maybe I’m high.

    • you’re high. there were more people in front of me, and they were a bit closer. but i didn’t want to post a pic of people without their permission, so it’s me and the trash can for this shot!

    • not really why i started the blog – it is still primarily here as a place to work out my family circumstances, but i find if i don’t post periodically, i get out of the habit of writing. this is for fun and silliness… when i’m not hoarking up my familial viscera!

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