“This is so fucking surreal!” Words uttered by my daughter very early this morning…
Somewhere around 2:00 am, i pulled my car onto the shoulder of an interstate highway, just in front of a police car with the lights flashing. Checking for traffic, i walked back towards the flashing lights. First my daughter appeared through the blinding lights, followed by the silhouette of the officer.
daisyfae: You’re ok!
The Girl [noticing my outfit under the black leather trench coat]: Jesus, Mom! Where were you?
daisyfae: Fundraiser… A costume party! Raising money to renovate the canoe club.
Officer Snarky: We have a “canoe club”? Seriously?
daisyfae: Christ! i took off the feather boa and General’s hat!
In the meantime, Studly McRocklegs has inspected the damage on the car.
Studly: Do you want to see this?
Walking over, i notice fur everywhere. As if it had snowed deer fur.
daisyfae: Damn! This could have been a lot worse. Where’s Bambi?
The Girl points to a large tan lump on the edge of the grassy median strip.
daisyfae: Sucks to be him…
We unload her gear into my car, Officer Snarky returns to his vehicle, saying he’s just going to fill out paperwork, update his facebook status, call a few friends, while we wait for the tow truck.
The Girl: This happens every time i’m about to leave the country*! It’s a jinx!
daisyfae: You’ve never been at fault in any of these accidents. Nothing you can do to avoid a suicidal deer, either.
After the tow truck arrives, and starts to haul the car onto the flatbed, we head back to my car.
Studly [to The Girl]: Do you want to ride up front, or in the back seat with the Djembe drum and hula hoop?
The Girl: I’m a vegetarian! I don’t kill things!
We got home, and somewhere toward sleep around 4:00am. She had to be at work at 6:00am. i drove.
Just another Saturday night. And what is the difference between surrealism and absurdism? Does it matter?
* For three trips overseas, she’s ended up involved in some sort of car accident within a week of her departure. In this case? i was really looking forward to having access to a non-shitmobile while she studies in London for a month. My guess is that the car will be in the body shop for most of that time…