Stuck in the middle

Two day roadtrip.  Met up with an old friend, who is currently in a job that could be my dream job… which i plan to pursue in a few years.  He shared with me some of the joys and frustrations of his new position.  Summed up with the following words of wisdom:

When you work for clowns?  Sometimes you’re gonna get a little seltzer in your pants.

Bring on the seltzer… i’m bored…

31 thoughts on “Stuck in the middle

  1. I came in here the other day and hit the back button so fucking quick because of some disease or illness you were writing about. You better not be contagious because if I get sick I’m blaming you!

    A bunch of things end up in my pants and I have put seltzer in them many times on purpose. However, if I were you I would… umm have you ever tried champagne in the p**** pants ? It’s not so boring if you have the right “old friend” around.

  2. lynn – i need some sort of challenge. for me “easy” does not equal “dream”. unfortunately….

    syncopated eyeball – what’s the old line? “do not mistake lots of activity for forward progress”. i’m busy, most certainly. not satisfied with what i do, at least momentarily…

    gnukid – not seltzer, exactly. unless there’s a way to fill a hot tub with seltzer…

    rob – he was asking for it. the boob, not the evil clown….

    renal failure – or you’re gonna gag….

    uk – i know. i almost used a pic of a zombie clown, but thought that would traumatize you worse… seriously. when i see evil clowns, i think of you. probably not what you had in mind….

    upset waitress – is that like using alka seltzer? i heard about that. and yeah, champagne would be classier….

    blazngscarlet – yeah, they are creepy. even when they’re not trying. does anyone actually LIKE clowns? besides other clowns? they’re not funny. there is something called “clown porn”, which i DON’T recommend googling…

    nursemyra – it’s a problem. the authorities have been notified….

    DP – i don’t care how big their, um…. feet are…. ain’t going anywhere near one…

    alljoedirt – for me? singing back up for joe cocker, but that’s unlikely. i’m a geek, so the dream job would be mega geeky. and i have a shot at one, if i can recover my technical mojo over the next couple years… which is harder than i thought it would be…. grrr….. maybe i should just dream of being a professional shoe shopper like some women?

  3. Better send this to Bill Clinton so he doesn’t end up in the same situation as he did with Monica.
    If a little Seltzer is all that happens you’re in good shape. it’s when you have to bring to shovel to work that things aren’t going well.
    Hate clowns ever since seeing Stephen King’s movie “IT” they scare the shit right out of me..(now where did I put that shovel)

  4. s. le – oh, now THERE’S a grand idea! carry my own flask for when the seltzer hits!

    upset waitress – got it! i’ll report out after the first experiment! found two bottles of Moet and Chandon in Mom’s garage last weekend!

    savannah – thanks! all’s well. just ruminating…

    squirrel queen – there were worse ones. i’m just a sucker for vintage pics…

    hisqueen – i really don’t know anyone who likes clowns, except other clowns. maybe we should give them their own country or something and be done with it…

    unbearable banishment – i know. i’m not whining. much. ok. well, maybe a little more than i should…

    syncopated eyeball – ‘boring’ and creepy. and annoying. and pointless. they are just oxygen thieves….

  5. silverstar – i’m spoiled. and i know it… there is no dream job. there is ‘get some satisfaction from earning your keep and doing something that you believe matters’ while living a life outside the office… as good as it gets.

    manuel – and bring the scotch. i need it…

  6. Always found clowns sad, not funny, and not anything close to scary. My demons have teeth. Dislike the circus. Tired out animals and faded glitz. Never had seltzer in the pants. Have drunk champagne out of a shoe however. (It was a (almost) new shoe, it was Moet & Chandon, it was a dare, the shoe’s owner had gorgeous blue eyes and I was drunk, ok? ) 🙂

  7. Pingback: I’ve got a nice pair! « I feel unusual…

  8. cynic: dream jobs are best left for dreamers.
    optimist: go for it! i have been shooting for a dream job for 15 months- and haven’t received a paycheck the whole time! (okay the situation is dire enough where i am going to have to settle for continued daydreams)

    where can i sign up to put on a clown suit and do children’s birthday parties?

  9. unpinned girl – for the right set of blue eyes? i could be talked into doing all sorts of whack things….

    Bb – i may need to look at this as a blessing in disguise. a clown suit, in fact…

    dave – i’m more cynical. i really just want to be a contributing member of a high performance team doing something that matters. is that too much to ask? sick of being lost, trying to find meaningful work in the midst of chaos and ego, and being surrounded by sleepyheads and fluffers… (sigh)

    uw – gotcha!

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