No parenting awards for 2009 either…

The Girl is splitting her time between her apartment and my condo while she explores future employment opportunities. When i got home from work tonight, she was busily texting her friend TW as they worked logistics for another friends bachelorette party this weekend.

The Girl: Hey, Mom? Do you have a penis mold? Something we could use for making chocolate party favors?

daisyfae: [gets up, walks into kitchen, produces penis mold] Like this?

The Girl: Exactly!

daisyfae: Well, i’ll need it back – i use that for making jello shots for parties…

The Girl: God! I can’t believe i can just ask my Mom for a penis mold… How strange is that? I’m going to let TW know that we don’t have to go out and buy one!  She was dreading that.

daisyfae: (sighing) But it’s important to be open and honest… i swear, i don’t think there’s anything the three of us could say to each other that would be a complete surprise…

The Girl: Oh, I bet The Boy probably has a few surprises up his sleeve…

daisyfae: i don’t wanna think about that…

The Girl: [laughing] TW wrote back – says she doesn’t find it the least bit surprising that you have a penis mold…

daisyfae: (sigh)

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22 thoughts on “No parenting awards for 2009 either…

  1. Sooooooo. Penis mold, eh? Is this a generic penis (size) mold? Or did someone special model for it? As in someone ‘specially..um…endowed? How big are these jello shots anyways? What sorts of party favours come penis shaped? (Oh! I made a pun. I think.)

    I’se jus’ wonderin’.

  2. fragrant liar – surprisingly? mine was received as a gift… someone specifically requested penis-shaped jello shots, and provided me with the mold… no kitchen is complete without one…

    archie – thank you… i should get around to forming my own cult one of these days. damned laziness…

    rob – they are small. about 2 oz sized… not meant to be intimidating, nor would they choke a normal human. hadn’t thought about doing body castings, for the life sized versions however… i like the way you think! is it a pun or entendre? (“entendre”…. that’s french for “pun”)

    renalfailure – no, that would take more kitchen resources than i have. however, the ron jeremy version is reported to be able to generate a jello shot that eats itself…

    anniegirl – ahhh…. classless and raunchy… just two of my less endearing traits.

  3. I’ve had nightmares where I ask my mother if she has a penis mold, and she produces one (dry heaving). Thank god The Girl has a way cooler mother.

  4. I think it’s great that you were able to find it so readily. My penis casting kit is under the bed, awaiting an opportunity to be “pressed into use”. One day, perhaps it, too, shall become a party favour.

  5. DP – AAAAAAAAAARGH! seriously…. duuuuuude…. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

    nm – yeah. kinda makes me a little sad… i’ve lost the element of surprise. maybe i need to become a bible-thumper for a couple years to keep people on their toes…

    unbearable banishment – yuk! that’s just gross…

    kono – that actually helps a bit!

    mstngsal – yeah, but i’m getting old. and am likely to become quite outrageous as i age… screw the red hats, i’m likely to shave my head and take up body building…

    stephanie – umm…. ain’t no food, that’s for sure!

    uncle keith – my daughter and her friend have decided to place peanuts in each of the testicles when they make the chocolates… clever girl…

    tigereyesal – penis casting kit?!?!? Oh, my goodness! THAT’S on my ‘to do’ list…

  6. i just love the relationship you have with your kids and wish you would write a best selling parenting book to teach others how to have the same!!!!

  7. silverstar – next trip to seattle? I’M THERE!

    paisley – not sure i’m a role model. will let you know in a few more years to see how they do when fully deployed from the nest!

  8. I can absolutely see this being my family in about 20 years. I wonder what new penis mold technology will be invented by then?

  9. rassles – yeah, but i bet your mom baked cookies and warmed your wet mittens in the dryer before you went outside to play in the winter….

    becca – 3D animatronic penis molds…. um… be right back. patent to file…

    morgan – great plan! we can use lemongrass for the nosehair!

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