Nurture or Nature

For Christmas this year, Mom bought my children Chia Pets.  My children and i have always held cheap and crappy gifts in rather high regard, so these were met with genuine glee!  This week, amidst frantic preparations for final exams and her unexpected graduation*, The Girl called to let me know that the two presents had sprouted fine plumage…
Donkey, with nose goblins, and Scooby Doo

Donkey, with nose goblins, and Scooby Doo

Chia Mullets
Chia Mullets

And with unexpected delight, she shared that these fine works of botanical art both sprouted mullets.  Proving once and for all that you can take the redneck clay pot out of the Trailer Park, but can never truly shed Trailer Park roots… 

My life.  Modeled in clay and bean sprouts…


* Given her international studies, The Girl fully expected that some of her credits earned abroad wouldn’t transfer, and that she’d be slaving away for another term.  Meeting with a guidance counselor, she was a bit surprised to learn that not only will she have enough credits to graduate this term, but she’ll have earned DUAL DEGREES in Arabic and International Studies (rather than the dual major she expected).  And with an Honors grade point average.  Her mother is bustin’ with pride!  As if i actually had anything to do with it…

28 thoughts on “Nurture or Nature

  1. Congrats to the girl on a job well done! (And to her mom too.)

    Ch-ch-ch-chia pet! For Christmas? Unbelievable. Reminds of the golf ball marker I received one year…

  2. Not just chisa, but Chias with MULLETS? It’s like those little lumps of clay knew they were going to a family with trailer park in their genes. Downright touching. (And yay, Daisy’s daughter!!!!)

  3. Congrats to the girl. She sounds brilliant like her mother. Nice to see that she hasn’t evolved too far from the trailer park, though. Personally, I think you can take the person out of the trailer park, but you can’t take the trailer park out of the person. It’s genetic.

  4. Love the chias! and well done baby girl. coincidentally it happens to be my younger son’s birthday…. you know… the one we were going to get together with your daughter to make us grandmothers?

  5. Ram – Welcome to The Park! And yes, there’s just a hint of The King in there… we’ll sell tickets and see what sort of press we can get. Hope he’s as big a draw as the “Virgin Mary Toast” from a few years ago…

    gnukid – totally going to track down the “Chia NASCAR”. Went to the official Chia site? And they’ve got a “Chia Obama”. That’s just scary… and yes. generation skipped. film at 11.

    rob – ah, but a golf ball marker is useful. theoretically. i mean, if you never played golf and someone got you one? that’d be “chia-esque”. and thanks for the congrats!

    archie – i hope the graduation translates into “Happy and Productive”… i’d try to send you one – seriously – but i have a feeling it would never clear agriculture in customs. pity, because i would be quite happy to become a ‘chia ambassador’. these things rock. fully.

    ginny – yes, it’s Chia-Karma… they are home. they knew they were home. they’d be wearing little wife-beater t-shirts if they had bodies… thanks for cheering!

    silverstar – thanks! i’ll make sure The Girl roots through the comment section today! yes, it’s in her. she’s officially 1/4 hillbilly – although i sometimes wonder if it skipped her, and The Boy got the extra 1/4 or something!

    nursemyra – i suppose i could put The Girl on a plane and we can let nature take it’s course. how does your son feel about “Sprout Sculpture”? (god, i’d LOVE to be a granny with you! that’d be the most fun, ever!)

  6. Congrats to the girl on a job well done, college ain’t all that easy to get through and she did it in fine form… i am also a big chia grower i just tend to the more traditional animal shapes, those are fine mullets though.

  7. ah…like Norman Rockwell imagined. But seriously, how fun would you two be to have as grandmothers – you’d be the first ever GILFS too, need I add. I say hellz yes! Let The Girl meet The Boy!!

    Thanks for the morning chuckle.

  8. I may have to reassess the Chia Pet for Christmas situation. Silly me, I’ve been giving things like The Flu, Ulcers, Strep Throat and The Plague. But, you know this since I posted about getting HIV for Christmas.

    As for the Daughter it’s time you ‘fessed up. When our children do something (anything) well it is always because of excellent parenting. When they mess up the fault is all their own since we would never have taught them any bad habits.


  9. Dual Degrees and successful at raising Chia’s—How great is your daughter!!! She is AWESOME!!!
    ?? how many years did she do Arabic Studies-and out of curiosity–why Arabic Studies??

  10. HAHAHAH! GILFs. Love it. Also, congratulations on raising such a brilliant daughter. You must be so proud!
    Love the mullets. I live in a city that is emotionally one large trailer park, so there are many, many mullets here to appreciate.

    Going to PS for the weekend, join me and we’ll tear the old town apart!

  11. tysdaddy – yep! she’s got finals next week then it’s behind her! suspect she’ll be a little shell shocked for awhile until it sinks in!

    kono – i loves me some chia, too! had fun with the Chia herb garden. about the time the novelty wore off and i got bored? they died! perfect for my attention span!

    pickles – glad to bring a smile! better than getting you drunk at noon! oh, and we’ll definitely be starting up a GILF – hunter website! great idea!

    unbearable banishment – any time! hey! let’s all sing the theme song from Gilligan’s Island!

    TAG – chia pets are wonderful gifts! the kind of gift that says “i think you’re silly, but i have no imagination and this is all i could find at the drugstore on christmas eve!”

    kyknoord – well, maybe if you rub more of the seeds on your head… drink more water… spend a little extra time in the sun…

    rob – you say that like it’s a bad thing? the 70’s are the new 60’s!

    hisqueen – 5 years, including 2 stints abroad… plus a year of arabic while she was still in high school, which is what got her started! she’s a goddess, if i do say so myself!

    beth – i’m a trained mullet hunter, yet have never participated in the Xtreme version of the sport, known as “mullet touching”. even i’m not that crazy… would love to join you in PS, but i’m afraid that if i see another airport anytime soon? i’ll go batshit crazy!

  12. Dual majors? Graduate degree?

    Damn I am jealous. I have to use spell check to even think of posting a blog..but I CAN hammer a nail straight!

    Congrates to the girl from far away on the East Coast (where its raining and craaaaaaapy.)!

  13. KevinJohn – yeah, she’s a bright little thing! worked her butt off for the past 5 years. hope the rain has blown out to sea and that you’ve got sunshine, lollipops, rainbows and all that shit!

    alex – truth be told? i was pretty proud of those chia mullets she grew, too. THAT’S MY BAAAAAAY-BEEEEEE!

    Bb – there must be a hillbilly pheromone. we must emit the stuff… she has less than The Boy and me, but it’s still in there…

    Rob – that’s just mean. have you ever tried to get rid of an earworm? best method EVER is to sing the words to Amazing Grace to the theme from Gilligan’s Island. Works perfectly…

  14. They’re quite special, aren’t they? I once had a similar thing which was a man’s head that grew cress. Equally special, and perhaps the only time I’ve had a useful bloke in my kitchen.

  15. gnu – what you need? “Hold the pickle! Hold the lettuce! Special orders don’t upset us! All we ask is that you let us serve it your way!”. HA! earworm RE-PLACE!

    dolce – she’s quite special! think she got the talent and brains from her dad’s side. unless she picked them up in a thrift store…

    cat – *snort* something nice about scraping the green stuff off a clay head and making a salad, isn’t there?

    tobymarx – love Billy Mays! and the overdub is fun! but i still wanna buy that stuff. like your new blogspace, and have you in my reader!

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