Past Blasting…

Had a ‘down day’ Saturday – due to the cold weather outside and an unexpected crush of estrogen imbalance inside.  Finally got around to accepting the “facebook”* invites i’d been getting from friends** and family members… Within about an hour, i was in touch with a good friend from childhood.  i’d met him when we were nine years old, and we were friends through about 10th grade when i dropped out of band…  He got me connected to my best friend from 7th grade within another hour…

The efficiency was astounding!  She and i yakked back and forth until quite late.  She dropped out of school in 10th grade, and was headed into some serious darkness – drugs, fast living and all that.  i was astonished to find her yesterday, happily working a management job, living in the suburbs with a smokin’ hot hubby, raising four kids and a GRANDBABY?  Huh?  She’s MY AGE?  WTF?

But the words flowed as if we’d never lost connectivity…

In our formative years, she and i got in deep trouble for our work as editors of the 8th Grade Mid-Year Literary Magazine, “Santa’s Shorts”.  Instead of being light and fluffy – as the title would suggest – most of the shit we collected was dark, acne-encrusted pre-teen angst. Kidnappings, runaways, abusive parents and young love misunderstood by the oppressive parental units…  Oops.  The School Board eventually got over it, but we were bonded for life as rebels… seeking to push the boundaries of artistic freedom to obliterate censorship.  Oh, and smoke as much ganja as two girls could ingest without collapsing like fleshy black holes into our very own navels…

Even more fun?  i had rabid “homely hippie chick lust” for her twin brother (sigh).  Beyond dreamy, he was the quiet, stoner-intellectual.  Dry wit, long hair and a closet full of anarchist t-shirts – what’s not to love?  We’ve already swapped some e-mails, and i’m looking forward to seeing where he’s been for the last 30 years.  And if he still likes hippie chicks…

Funny how it works, though.  We are who we were.  Crustier of soul and doughier of body.  How much do we really change?

"New Orleans? You were SUCH a bead-slut..."

"Remember New Orleans? You were SUCH a bead-slut..."

* i think with the addition of so many of us “old folks” out there in the social networking world, suspect that the young ‘uns will abandon it for implanted RFID chips + GPS tracking and virtual reality software… or whatever the next thing shall be…

** Theater folks love facebook… i went from zero to 60 friends in just over 24 hours… Trippy…

22 thoughts on “Past Blasting…

  1. Chemistry between two individuals is a mysterious thing. Once you click, you stay clicked. That’s the crux of the Facebook success story. You must BEWARE! Facebook can dredge up things better left buried. But you already know that, don’t you?

  2. I talked to my Grandma when she was in her eighties about how people changed as they aged and she said, “I’m still the same girl inside that I was when I was 19. The outside just doesn’t bend like it used to.”

  3. Fortunately, none of my high school or earlier folks have found me on Facebook. All my “friends” are internet friends. And I like it that way. But then again, I’m a loner, and always have been. A true wall-flower in those days, and in person, I doubt anybody remembers me. I think you are lucky to be so outgoing.

  4. I like the idea of catching up with people we once shared our secrets with so long ago, and seeing how they’ve changed. But I agree, I think we are basically all the same inside, but for less space available in our brains. At 53, I am the same girl I was at 20.

    I’ve been toying with the idea of six degrees of separation and may try to catch up with an old boyfriend who has the most common name in America (Bruce Anderson), to see what he’s up to. Seeing how someone you once loved looks after 35 years ago would be interesting.

  5. i am very cautious of the facebook phenomena, mostly because i can easily see being sucked into spending more than my spare time keeping up with it. but, nonetheless, am glad you have found old compadres and compadrettes to reconnect with.

  6. I made a choice some months ago – fall off the face of the earth or put myself completely out there. Clearly I chose the latter, but I’m not sure it was the right choice. I already had a bunch of old boyfriends looking me up and I didn’t like that. Sometimes there’s a reason you haven’t kept in touch with someone – and other times you wonder how you ever let them go.

  7. I echo gnukid’s comments about the time suck thing. I’ve observed many become absorbed for a while. Fortunately, I think most back off and go back to real life.

    What I don’t understand, though, is sometimes the breadth of personal life that is actively shared in such an open forum. I haven’t yet felt “icky” about anything I’ve read posted by those I know or are related to, but it’s come close.

  8. Oh and yeah, gnukind and Rob are right you have to be acareful what you say and post on Facebook especially. They are quite unashamed when it comes to collecting private information.

  9. This is a little off-topic but I have a theory about personality and aging. We just become more and more like what our dominant traits were when we were growing up. the nicest patients with dementia were nice when they were young and the cranky ones were always bastards.

    so if you liked someone a lot and were close to them in the 10th grade there’s a good chance that you’d still get along now.

  10. I like Facebook…no horror stories~yet~. No creepy people better left forgotten have contacted me, and with the status updates its easy to keep up with.
    And my ManChild likes to send me flair.

  11. unbearable banishment – that which is ‘buried’ for me? is literally buried. he’s been dead since i was 26…

    beth – LOVE grandma… that about sums it up!

    silverstar – not sure if it’s lucky or not. i genuinely enjoy people. well, except when they’re in airports, or on airplanes (go figure). i had the same grim angst back in the teens as most folks, but the crazies i spent time with provided such a pleasant buffer… just good to find them again.

    KJ – sounds like an interesting experiment. good luck – and may he be hot, available and living on the beach somewhere warm!

    gnu – it’s been a burst getting set up, and ‘chatting’ with so many folks initially (catching up after 30 years), but i think it’ll mellow. otherwise, i’m going to buy a case of froot loops and some soy milk and call it a life…

    amber – not crazy about ‘crossing the streams’. i’ve got work folks, friends from childhood, a few blogmates, and an army of theater people out there. plus some of my cousins, and potentially one of my sisters… need to keep the ‘blog’ independent for now, i think…

    rob – with a posse of theater people, i’m certain to run into the occasional “Ewww…” when someone shares details of a pesky infection that won’t clear up or something. looking forward to that… not….

    alex – never, ever bogart! talked with my 7th grade (his sister) for 2 hours last night, and he’s single… will absolutely get to see him sometime this year when he’s around visiting his twin. i’m probably about done putting up info – some minor privacy concerns, but i’m a fairly public figure in my personal life, anyway, so not sure it matters much more…

    nm – not off-topic. dead on topic… i agree with you completely. we are who we were plus… i’m still in touch with many old friends (even before falling into the facebook zone). that sort of connection is strong. talked with my 7th grade friend for 2 hours last night – she and i haven’t seen or spoken to each other in 30 years — but it was as if we’d never lost contact. the parallel of our paths are fascinating as well… maybe just a little frightening. she influenced me back then, and i influenced her – and the resulting 46-year old women are unusually aligned… cool stuff!

    miss – my kids aren’t into it…. so i guess that means i can post trampy pics of me and my girl posse getting dressed up for frat parties, doing kegstands, and going topless at spring break!

  12. HEY! I’m on facebook, and you haven’t befriended me 8) And re the UFC: Gaygaygaygaygay. I have a selection of “arthouse” dvd’s, and I’m sure half the ‘actors’ and most of the moves in them are straight (if you’ll pardon the pun) off the UFC Circuit 8)

  13. uncle keith – you sexy beast…

    kyknoord – change socks? i still own (and occasionally wear) clothing that i wore in 1978. seriously. they’re lucky woobies… i’m not dead yet!

    miss – done. check your e-mail… and “Shhhhh….”. in Facebook-land, i don’t blog… my family is out there…

    manuel – “friends” who aren’t really friends? isn’t that what Facebook is all about?

    derek – i’ll try to find you! and thanks for validating the “UFC” issue. i’ll have to pass along your comment to The Boy. As a card-carrying, gold star homosexual, you have some serious street cred…

  14. I spoke with my closest childhood friend the other night.
    He called to wish me a happy birthday.
    Although I only talk to him 2X a year, our conversations go on forever.
    You? A rebel?
    Kinda figgered . . .

  15. Facebook IS the older generations version of networking–MySpace is for the younguns. You can watch the breakdown in my family–I’m on Facebook, as is my oldest brother, and the younger two are on MySpace. Ah, generation gaps. So lovely.

  16. ~m – i’m having a blast, reconnecting with old friends. first meet up will be sunday, and i can’t wait! i’m sure there be trolls out there, but i’ll battle the trolls to get to the princes and princesses!

    Stanky – yep. my kids explained this to me as well… best i can tell, it’s ‘post-college’ on facebook because there’s better privacy management. all the pedophiles apparenlty hang out at myspace.

  17. Pingback: Forever young… not… « Trailer Park Refugee

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