Wisdom from 6062 miles away…

The Girl has settled into her university gig in Beirut.  It is beyond awe-inspiring to read her words as she shares details of her days getting acclimated to the people, culture and program.  From her earliest teen years, she has exhibited a quiet grace, and a “beyond her years” wisdom that has left me speechless on more than one occasion.

Tonight’s “update”?  Brought tears to my eyes as she shared unexpected insight.  Could not be more proud than when she brought the following possibility into my frame of reference – perhaps forever altering my perspective on that remarkable and gifted creature that shares my daily existence…

She’d read my last post – including the reference to the mess created by the random neural firings of Mr. Pickles, my canine life partner functionally retarded dog.  Because the dog has destroyed the rug where i was planning to install the billiards table, i had to regroup, adjusting plans for full “move in”.  Rather than get the pool table, i now have to address the underlying problem* and install ceramic tile.  To continue with the planned condo modifications, i moved forward with the purchase and installation of the home theater/audio system throughout my domain…

Sorry to hear about Pickles acting upon his dog signals and digging up the rug. Bastard. Gotta love him though, he just ain’t that smart. Or maybe he is and just wanted you to build up the home-theater/man-trap/man-cave first**? He knows that the theater guy he was cracker-dogging*** for would be the one to install it and that The Boy would become a constant fixture afterwards, and he just wants a buddy. The more I think about it, the more I think that Pickles is smarter than us all.

Perhaps i’ve completely misjudged the large, brown, and frequently aromatic, creature that shares my daily existence?  In an idiot savant way, perhaps the dog serves as a guiding force in my life?  Maybe he is my protector and “yoda”, teaching me the ways of life in his slow, slobbery and “get the fuck out from under my feet when i’m going down the stairs, you numb-nutted bastard” way?

So much to be gained from a fresh perspective…  Primary beneficiary?  The fur-encrusted destruction machine… who will live to see at least another week…

___________

* Cheap and easy… yeah, i know.  But if i don’t take the occasional verbal bunny shot, then i’m losing points.  At least that’s how it works on the basketball court.

** “home-theater/man-trap/man-cave” perhaps requires some explanation.  The new condo is truly going to be my “bubble”.  Barbie Dream House for middle-aged party girl.  Several years ago, i decided i wanted a pool table – i enjoy billiards, but suck at it due to lack of practice.  i also decided i wanted an integrated whole-house audio system, multi-zone, all digital, remote controlled.  Oh, and ya just gotta get wall-mount HDTV, Blu-Ray and all the fixins if you’re going to do that!  The Boy has begun referring to the new place as “Mom’s Man Trap”.  At the same time, he refers to the theater room as his future “Man Cave” as there are no windows, no clock, and he will be able to cocoon there with no interaction with the outside world…  All i know?  i ain’t building this for anybody but me… but if it tends to collect boy toys?  Who am i to complain?

*** “Cracker-dogging” – ummm, perhaps that also requires explanation.  i believe the term can be attributed to James Herriot, from “All Creatures Great and Small” fame… To anyone who has ever seen it, you will know what it means… Sometimes, when playing, a dog will simply go bonkers, racing wildly around a room, doing banked turns off furniture, demonstrating great “tires” through abrupt directional changes at high speed.  Mr. Pickles – for reasons only known to him – had a powerful response to the gentleman who came to do the site assessment for home theater/audio installation.  For quite a while.  The Boy and i (not to mention the salesman) were laughing our asses off as 100 lbs of smokin’ fast dogmeat tore around the room demonstrating banked turns, frantic bursts of speed, ferrari-like ground-hugging maneuvers…and a big ol’ tongue flapping along beside him…

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13 thoughts on “Wisdom from 6062 miles away…

  1. How good is he with a lightsabre, though? Incidentally, I see that the steady creep of explanatory text has reached an all-time high. The footnote to entry percentage now stands at just under 86%.

  2. My friends dog does that all the time and a different friends old dog used to do it all the time, both Jack Russels. Just all of a sudden spac out and start running as fast as possible for no reason. Of course you have to try and catch them, or else your just missing out on half the fun.

  3. silverstar – it always tears me up when they start cracker-dog… how can you not laugh at a dog going completely bonkers for no apparent reason? i think it would make life much more interesting if people occasionally did that….

    kyknoord – we had his lightsabre removed. at least the batteries for it… poor bastard. spends many hours a day cleaning himself in that region looking for them i suppose… as for my “explanatory text” ratio? bite me. when you start writing in actual sentences again, you can throw that rock… and by my math? it was only 83%…

    alex – Mr. P is a big boy… he’s not terribly hard to catch. generally we just fall on him, corner him, or start diving for his tail… major sport in our house is “dog wrasslin'”…

    nm – i’ve never seen a cat do it… but then again, haven’t spent much time around cats (always had dogs). random “cat launch” would be just as funny, though…

  4. My dad’s Irish Setter does that ALL the time. He is such a big dog, I have seen him actually take out some of the smaller members of the family while he has been on one of his tears.
    Cracker doggin’ is new for me…will use in the future.

  5. wait a minute… which one is the fur-encrusted one? The Boy or the Canine Life Partner? Both? I guess you’d actually have to judge from the drool left behind whatever life force is there…

  6. Miss – yep. Mr. P can knock over substantial pieces of furniture. Hence my collection of heavy wooden objects, with cushions…

    Bb – Prescription? Much to the complete and total amazement of many who know me, i am completely unmedicated. Perhaps that’s the problem?

    gnu – Ummm… good point. When The Boy shaves, it’s a more obvious distinction…

  7. Oh god, girl. Your description of cracker-dogging is perfect. Fucking brilliant. Lucy is most likely to engage in cracker-dog fits towards the end of a short hike, toward the beginning of a long one, and at any time should another dog arrive. What I love about it is the pure joy, the exuberant happiness that requires every bit of their bodies to burst out with energy. I want some of what they got!

  8. Empress Stankalicious – It is pure joy! I just wish i could do it… would be hard to explain when i meet someone cool why i just go bonkers, start tearing around the room and being silly…

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