Pizzaria Vengence

The Boy has been working at a family owned pizza parlor in the backwoods burg quaint hamlet where he’s spent his freshman year.  It’s been a growth experience for him in many ways, as he’s been there from the day they opened.  Definitely enhanced his business skills.

Friday was his last day.  Seems The Boy has learned something about working for someone with a lack of integrity.  Never mind the fact that the married pizza-shop owner has relentlessly pursued one of his female employees, he stole the tips from the employees, and then lied about it.

Stole tips.  As manuel as my witness, is there anything lower than that?  It’s a call-ahead or order-at-the-counter restaurant.  They have a tip jar by the cash register, and since all employees are paid the same amount – whether they are working in the kitchen or waiting on customers – the tips were to be shared by all workers.

My son was only going to be working there through the end of summer, as he’s transferring to the main campus of his university in the fall.  Since the boss hadn’t coughed up the tip money – even though the restaurant had opened in February – The Boy asked about it a few weeks ago.  The boss said he’d do the payout at the end of the quarter.  Staying on it, The Boy asked again – and was given a slightly different answer: “You’re not getting any anyway since you work in the kitchen”.

Finally, the boss came through with an additional $50 for each of six employees.  When The Boy did the math and said “You’re telling me that in the 7 months we’ve been open, there’s only been $300 in tips? Less than a dollar a day?  There was $25 in the tip jar just last night!”  The boss blew a nut, went off on him and said that he was only paying the tips that had been added to credit card orders.  That the cash would be added later… and that it was another $280. 

Again, The Boy countered that there was no way they’d been tipped that little, as $20/day would have been at least $3,600, or about $600 per employee.  The boss was apparently pissed that The Boy could do math, launched a into a tirade, and yelled at him througout his entire shift. 

The Boy was pissed.  Being lied to, yelled at and screwed with does not make him a happy li’l redneck.  There is enough Trailer Park in him that he wanted to get even…  So he planned his response carefully last week.  He was off on Wednesday and Thursday, and was scheduled to return on Friday at 4:00 pm.  Picking up his check at noon, he told the boss that he had to run some errands.

He proceeded to run his errands and returned here, to the homestead.  Went out and played skateboards with his friends, took a nap, watched some TV… and at 4:30, his friend at the pizza place sent the first text message, saying the boss asked her to check on his whereabouts.  This went on for awhile.  Finally, she called saying the boss was barking at everyone because The Boy hadn’t shown up. 

The Boy finally called the boss.  At 8 PM.  The boss asks “are you coming in?”.  He replied “you still think I’m coming in today? Four hours late?” which launched bossman into the stratosphere.  After listening to the tirade, saying a lot of “I dunno’s” to the inane questions, The Boy finally said “Look, this conversation isn’t going anywhere.  You’re repeating yourself” and hung up.

Seconds later the phone rang again.  The Boy ignored it.  He was amused when the phone rang almost immediately from a “Restricted Number” – as if he wouldn’t figure out that the boss had switched phones?  Finally, the boss left a voicemail.  This was all The Boy wanted – audio proof that the boss is an asshole.

Transcribed below, for your amusement (and to broadcast the stupidity of this pencil-dicked boneheaded boss-from-hell far and wide) is the voicemail my son plotted an entire week to receive!**

“You know, what I want to know is what time do you get up in the morning?  What time do you get up and decide to fuck me over, huh?  I could have fired you five times, but I didn’t and then you don’t even call, don’t have the courtesy, as much as I’ve done for you. I let you keep your job.  But guess what? Now you’re terminated.  TERMINATED!  Do you know what that means?  You better not put me down as a reference, because you know what? You won’t get one!  You just screwed yourself.  Coming to work inotxicated*, and I just let it slide.  I didn’t fire you.  I can’t believe how dumb you are.


* At this point, i stopped listening and asked if he had, in fact, gone to work drunk.  “No.  Hungover, but not drunk.”

** It’s done.  While The Boy and his friends were concocting several possible responses, he knew he’d let it all go.  My favorite of the proposed responses?  Just to call the boss’ voicemail, and leave answers to all of the questions, as in: “11:30, What?, Yes, Really?…”

22 thoughts on “Pizzaria Vengence

  1. Good for the Boy.
    The guy sounds like a total Greek douchebag only out for himself.
    The Boy should call him though if only to tell him to shove a great big Gyro up his fat ass.
    Sometimes people in charge really suck the proverbial meatpickle.
    Hope it all worked out.
    Tell the Boy the same thing I tell my daughters: Don’t take shit from anyone.

  2. This makes me so sad. I think about The Boy being treated in such a callous and unfair manner and realize that not only will this happen to him again, but that when they’re old enough, my two daughters will get their turn as well. You can’t protect them from this stuff, can you?

  3. This is especially egregious because the Federal government figures that you make at least 8% on tips, and adds that to your wages, and taxes you on it. And in a lot of places, the restaurant minimum wage is considerably lower than the real minimum wage, and you are supposed to make the rest up in tips. In Washington State, that is not the case.
    The good news is that working for this douchebag he probably didn’t make enough money to have to pay taxes. And now we know how the douchebag is planning to get out of paying unemployment should the Boy file. He is going to contend that the boy was fired “for cause”, ie, being intoxicated on duty, which will kill his unemployment. Yeah, I’ve been fired a few times. But never for cause, and I’ve even beaten the evil schemers who tried to kill my unemployment.
    The Boy is young, and can get away with this shit, as I suppose he is not going to make a career of pizza. But he should wise up to legal ways to get what he needs from these douchebags, because they are everywhere. I would have started with the state wage and hour agency.

  4. Hello there, found you via the lovely nursemyra.

    If anything good can be taken out of this it’s now that he’ll be better seasoned at spotting deadbeat bosses in his career post college. Except it won’t be tip jars but rather raises, yearly bonuses and other things These guys come in the guise of pizza place owners to Vice Presidents of fortune 500 companies. Sad that these people earn a living at screwing people over isn’t it?

  5. Um, you can go here to find out what the minimum wage in your state for tipped employees is. If the Boy is being paid part of his wages as tips, it is legal in much of the US, although it according to Manuel, it has been outlawed in Northern Ireland.
    One more way in which we are behind the rest of the civilized world.

  6. Tips have been divided up amongst all workers – including the kitchen – at all the restaurants that my eldest daughter has worked in. Well, except for one small cafe owned by Asians; they didn’t seem to understand the local customs.

    I’m surprised The Boy took this crap as long as he did. I’d have been tempted to have a conversation with the owner “up close”. (Of course, that never solves anything.)

  7. ~m – “…suck the meatpickle” Nice! totally using that one! Always tell my kids, at home and at work, that you can learn something from every work experience, good or bad. Sometimes it’s as simple as “how not to treat fellow human beings”… The guy is a weasel. A breadstick up the bunghole would be a nice touch….

    annie – His friend was getting yelled at, or he probably wouldn’t have called. And yes, the other lesson has always been “go to college. it doesn’t necessarily make you smarter, but it can make your life easier”.

    unbearable banishment – No, you can’t protect them, but you can prepare them. First encounter for us with such things was the rare “bad teacher” situation. Rather than asking to have my kids placed with a different, we worked with them on learning how to deal with the circumstances – minimize “inflammation”, give them just enough to keep them off your back, focus on other good things. i specifically told them “this prepares you for a future bad boss, difficult colleagues and life…

    silverstar – since this wasn’t a “sit down” restaurant, all employees were paid just about minimum wage, so the tip jar was simply a ‘bonus’ for employees. As to the “firing for cause”, i suspect you’re right – that the boss was setting the stage to assure that The Boy wouldn’t be able to claim unemployment (not that he was planning to in this case). Yep. All part of the “life training” that we get as we get out into the world!

    alex – Nice! If he called back, it was going to be 3 AM. That’s a nice call to get in the middle of the night! He is choosing to move on – a good decision – although it’s not nearly as much fun!

    DP – no, i’m pretty sure he’s not yours… My “uncertain” years were a bit earlier… Although when he was young, he did have a thing for putting boxes on his head… Hmmmm…

    ricardo – Any friends of nursemyra are friends of mine! Welcome to The Park! And yes, the lessons of the pizza shop are directly transferable into other business ventures. Sad, but true. There be weasels everywhere!

    nm – that would be the case in an ethical shop. that way the people who worked that night benefit from the tips. But alas, the shitweasel was using the money to buy Viagra…

    silverstar – good link! Servers in restaurants in my state make $3.00/hour! and are expected to make up the rest in tips. Wow… Since he was paid the full minimum wage, it doesn’t apply, but that was quite an eye-opener…. Yes, it seems an antiquated system…

    rob – that’s the way it’s supposed to work. what sort of disappointed The Boy was that he was the only one to confront the boss directly. The other employees grumbled about it, and backed him up “behind the scenes”, but no one else took up the charge. Another life lesson… He was close to quitting several times, but he knew it was only until the end of summer anyway….

  8. Reminds me a little of a summer job I had when I was 16, driving an ice cream truck for an Ohio hillbilly redneck dickhead that fucked over his young employees in every way imaginable. I stuck it out for a month, then left after my shift one day, never to return. I didn’t bother to tell the guy I was quitting, but I managed to drop unwrapped cherry popsicles into the gas tanks of most of his trucks before I left the garage.

    I never heard from him, but when I drove by his company several times over the following week, I noted with satisfaction that many, many trucks were still parked in the lot during business hours. Pay kids minimum wage, plus a miniscule commission, then deduct for “maintenance and mileage” at the end of the month? Fuck off, jackass! 🙂

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  10. oh the boy should definitely file for unemployment, when the boss contests it because he was fired “for cause” make the boss produce the proper paperwork and schedule a hearing, make him cite the days and times of said offenses, in short make the bastard sweat and show up for a hearing and let it be known to said scumbag that the whole little tip debacle will come out in court and quite possibly be reported anonomsyly to the good ole IRS, then the dipshit boss will think twice before messing with his employees again, here in good ole Pennsyltucky if you don’t have the paperwork in order it doesn’t matter how much of a moron the employee was they usually win the unemployment hearing and get paid. good luck

  11. manuel – i think there is a weener-pox. perhaps that’s why he didn’t get very far with his young female employee?

    kono – toyed with the idea, just to make the arsehole miserable and force the “tip” issue into the sunshine. but he and i agree – unemployment should probably be used for the folks that truly need it. The Boy will have another job lined up within days once he gets settled into the new place… but i like the way you think!

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