The Boy and The Girl were home last weekend. I had just returned from a week of travel, and the three of us were drinking catching up, while tormenting the dog. (Note to the “Mother Of The Year” Award Nominating Committee Members? Move along… there’s nothing to see here…)
Around midnight, the doorbell rang. The Boy looked out the window, and said “oh, that’s D…”, and went downstairs to open the door. Since most of his friends have been banished from the house (due to a series of incidents last summer), he stepped out on the porch to chat.
Less than 5 minutes later, he came back upstairs, looking a little rattled and confused. “That was awkward…”
“Who was it? What was that about?”
“It was D and his brother. Wanting to know if I’d slept with his brothers’ girlfriend.”
The Girl and I both demanded answers: “Well? Did you?”
This was met with the noncommital cranial rotation – not a ‘yes’, not a ‘no’, but some general head movement… and some mumbles along the lines of “kinda blacked out… ” and “… i might have been drinking the first time”.
Clearly, guilty as charged.
“Well what did you tell them?”
“Damn… D’s brother is a big guy… HUGE guy… I kinda said a lot of ‘huh’s?’ and ‘what’s?’ and said I wasn’t really sure about all that, I was pretty drunk most of last summer, and didn’t really remember much…”
The Girl and I, sensing that a sister somewhere has been treated poorly, started the verbal beating – “you shit heel! you really nailed this girl? you don’t even own up to it? you don’t remember!?!?!?”
After another hour of psycho amazon warbitch from hell bludgeoning discussion, we got the rest of the story, and were convinced that while he might have been an asshole about it, he really didn’t know that she was seeing his friends brother. Well, the first time he hooked up… and she was the aggressor… and not just with him, allegedly. Oh, and he is 19 years old. And owns a penis.
Definitely, the kid is showing his ‘roots’. But most disturbing to me? He may have a future in politics…
Trailer Park Refugee 
Glad he didn’t get a beating !
i have a sinking feeling he hasn’t heard the last of that one yet……
lksn – well, not from the big guy on the porch, but his sister and i gave him a pretty brutal thrashing… he might have preferred getting his ass kicked!
paisley – i’m pretty sure the guys don’t know where he lives (when he’s not home), so he has a safe crash pad. it might blow over…
Every guy has that motto, right? You know the one – “have penis, will travel.” lol
bent – welcome to The Park… i suppose that’s the motto until something nasty gets ahold of it and puts a buzzkill on that ol’ penile roadtrip!
A future in politics? How embarassing.
nah… he’s destined for greater things than politics. plus he can’t lie convincingly. look at how quickly he cracked 🙂
kn – exactly… but it wouldn’t last. once the media got ahold of the extended family ‘entertainment’? it would be brutal…
nm – true that! and he’s never once thumped a bible, kissed a baby or posed for a photo op at a homeless shelter. there’s hope!
Ooh, can you give him a belated thwack from me? 🙂
Didn’t recall indeed …
Awh a proud day for you I’m sure……19? My dad had wait a while longer before he had to fend off upset fathers/brothers from our door….
The gal sounds like a big slut to me.
uw – touche!
az – tee hee! did i mention he’s been reading the blog? did i mention that he (and The Girl) helped me draft this particular entry? consider him smacked!
manuel – most importantly, he is comfortable talking to me about such things. very, very happy about the level of communication that we’ve got.
uw – that’s about where The Girl and i ended up, although there are always a few sides to any story. She was allegedly making the rounds last summer…
toby – that’s french! and i’ve seen you use german, too! skilled as a photographer, and writer, and also multi-lingual? 🙂
well… lingual, anyway. 😛
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